wear · and · tear · these · rocking · horse · shoes!

why is an alcohol edu course telling me about riots and how to be safe in a riot?
I made a 90 on the pretest,
I shouldn't have to waste four hours on this.

my mind is in other places.
thinking
about Darfur and genocide and how
stupid that
it is still an issue
why?

there are no answers to such questions

animation in progress.

megauploaded, but still unfinished and unmusicked.






also, I totally thought Uli was going to win project runway, but then they gave it to jeffery [the bg music to his totally sucked] --- not that I didn't like jeffery's collection, I just thought Uli's was more perfect.

my university gives its students free webspace/hosting; so I'm going to teach myself how to code and do all of that stuff by making my own space.

Right now I'm planning the layout, so I haven't really started it, but offhand, does anyone know any good sites or books to visit about making a website?

I'll convince my parents to give me one of the cameras and I'll probably scan in my sketchbook.


so many plans, so few lifetimes

I'm so pent up...everything, incredible, dying. I can tell because, while I normally sing when I drive by myself, today I've been screaming and freaking and going crazy.

I have a selfportrait due in six hours. I need to spend four on it. I will spend the four on it, because it made me kinda embarassed to admit that the last one I only spent three on. But I can't lie to prodecker -- I love him and his art too much. I should idolize my teachers less, but they should stop being srsly amazing. at least they aren't incredibly attractive.

but charcoal is boring. and intercross, while interesting and useful, is not highly appealing. I want paint!

"On Sept. 7, the former 9th planet was assigned the asteroid number 134340 by the Minor Planet Center (MPC)." I love how it seems that astronomers have neglected to take any elementary psychology/sociology classes.

Craig is becoming cooler every time I see him. Too bad he's too old for me. [I will find myself a crazy husband yet, lol] But this means that I try to [mos def] scrape it to go florence for the summer because he's sponsoring it, it just gets more and more attractive.

I need to learn how to sleep.

anyway. here's one of my more complicated photojunks

the boy I liked sent me an email eight lines long, to an address I scribbled small, five months ago.
he's never sent and he's rarely called, but I stopped calling too/ myself secretly hurt.

the other girl, she dumped him. two weeks after they started. the week of graduation, & she was also his first.

the email was about Regina and daisies. eight choppy poem short lines of saying
~ regina is coming to town. hope you are well.

...

I swear he confuses the hell out of me. This is why I gave up on him.  too bad I still like him.

Maybe being an artist is hxcore but, I don't even really fit in with most of the other "artistic kids" here.  I was cool with Kelly and Marc back home, but that was based on mutual respect for each other's ablities. Here, they have this elite attitude where whoever is wearing the coolest shirt is popular. I can't say I'm better than them in that respect, because I write them off because they aren't good artists.  [and by deduction I don't want to be friends with poser art kids, but it irritates me that they don't pay attention to the non-scenester me me?] Yeah, I realize emotions are backwards like that.

anyway, the only real news~
I'm going to wear my MAM dress to school tomorrow. I'm a little scared, but I'm not going to let myself punk out.

Happy Birthday to me~

Send me an email! I check it too much now.

Also, I figure I've spent about 380 some dollars on clothing off the internet since I got a paypal. Which was like in july. Crazy.

I don't buy things just to sell it. If I'm coughing up my dearly earned money to buy something, I've done some serious deliberate thinking about it first. I can't count the times I'll be working(I work retail) and I'll see something I want to buy. A really cute bustier for four dollars. Things on clearance for 85%(w/discount) off. I don't buy it. Why? Insatiable need to save money.... so that when I dish out my 200 bucks for a dress, I can.

Which is what I did. Then I got an email asking if I wanted to sell it, and that I would get more than I bought it for, if I didn't wear it (at least let me try it on!). That's a little ridiculous, because if I'm going to spend so much money (its a lot for me!) on a dress, it shows that I like the dress more than the money. No, I don't really want to sell it especially since its my first lolita dress and its for my birthday.

This would have been so much ruder irl...

I noticed sailor and pirate lolita seem to be in style. I like the twist, I think its a cute turn for lolita clothes. So I tried designing a loli outfit that had a bit of that nautical flair but still was elegant. 

I'm sick with something nasty that's worked its way up to my ears now and is reminding me horribly of the time I broke my eardrum. I keep expecting to bleed out my ears, but it hasn't happened yet. Give it a couple of days. Also, had to call in sick today and called a little too late for their comfort. I can't say much on that because it will depress me. I'm already unsatisfied up to my pain ridden ears...

but anyway, I saw this lady's sketchjournal blog thing and I think I'm going to do the same with mine, or the finished pages at least. I haven't finished anything really substancial this summer. I started a really lovely painting and but haven't finished it, I suppose I'll post that too so I can motivate myself to finish it. although I need more white.

I really want some super sculpey so I can start making a dollfie...I've been hacking and cutting so I think it be better for me to do something 3d to fit this mood. That reminds me, I registered for classes, a monday through thursday schedule

english 1102 (unless I get a five haha on my english ap, then I dunno what I'll take)
trig (or as its really called, precalculus. I'm taking this for the A)
gsu 1010 (art exercises and uh learning about gsu and atl)
art history
drawing class (actually, I could skip this, but I want to take it)
and a sculpture class.

I was anticipating a design class, but I don't want a class that starts after five. I'll have to wake up for 8oclock classes, but then again, my days would end around 4-5 and I would have friday off.

ah, back again. mostly I joined to keep up with all my EGL lovelies and nuture my vivienne westwood and nana love.
but also because when I had a livejournal, I wrote...now I have nothing but a myspace and I do not write at all. I suppose that is also the fault of not having someone who I want to write an email to.

neways, first post and my head is filled with anticipation, at the rocking horse shoes that I will oneday own and adore, at the university I oneday will attend, at my birthday that will soon come, and all the art I have yet to make.

much love.